Please, please, pretty please tell me that this is a satire article of some kind. I don't think I can continue living knowing that there's a company which calls itself "Compellent".

I can just see the brainstorming session that vomited that one up on the table: "I've got it! Awesoment!" "Nah, too obvious. How about Greatent?" "Not enough characters." "Superent? Terrificis? Persuasys?" "Ah hah! That's it! COMPELLENT!"

At least Persuasys would have had a shred of originality.