Waaaa waaaa waaaa
"How about a UI that doesn't look like it was designed by a furry-toothed geek? Will they have that?"
That's your opinion - you're entitled to it. FWIW I disliked GNOME intensely when I first used a few years back.. since then it has improved immensely and, personally, I can really appreciate some of the results of the usability studies that were done (many by Sun).
"Will I be able to install arbitrary (non-repo) software without having to go to a shell prompt as root?"
You've been able to do that through the UI for years on Ubuntu if the software is packaged up as .deb or (with some caveats) as .rpm - that pretty much encompasses all packaged software for Linux. If the software is in another format, or as source code, then you will need to resort to other means - that's true - sorry if having a lot of choice sometimes inconveniences you.
"Obviously, I won't be able to run any of my existing software"
Why ? What software are you using ? Windows based ?... much of that will run to a greater or lesser degree under Linux (usually lesser) and where not there may be alternatives... there may not, or you may not like them, in which case why would you want to swap to Ubuntu ?
", but I'm sure useless 2.0rhea crapola and an iTunes ripoff will make it all better."
Nah - probably not. It doesn't float my boat but it might make it more popular with some folk, and is increasingly being seen on devices such as phones, PDAs and MIDs - but that's for the user to decide whether it's useful or not.
Why are you so bitter ? If you don't like, and don't need it, then fair enough - but i'm sorry to say that the reality of the situation is that it might actually be appealing to some other people, whether you like that or not. Get a grip.