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back to article Crapita ITS stomps pay rise hope, flushes 2012 bonuses

Cost-cutting Capita IT Services (ITS) has warned staff that bonuses will once again be shelved and salaries frozen in 2012. The integrator called for voluntary redundancies before Christmas and kicked off austerity measures including a review of travel and subsistence across ITS and procurement of systems and services. In an …

COMMENTS

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Silver badge

Is everyone's pay frozen?

Or do the managers who decided that the shop floor should share the pain get a bonus for being so decisive?

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Anonymous Coward

Don't take the piss, no doubt it was a very "difficult decision".

At least that's what the management always said to us at Logica before announcing redundancies.

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Anonymous Coward

...

... and some of us can't remember when we last got a pay raise or bonus.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: very "difficult decision"

"Indeed, it very nearly spoilt my four-week holiday to the Seychelle Islands last year"

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Anonymous Coward

Free Friday Title

Hush now heretic. Andy Green needs a bigger bonus and what right have you to stand in his way?

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Anonymous Coward

Morale

It's so low, we don't even know the meaning of the word.

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Re: Morale

"The company has a problem. A recent survey showed the morale has dropped from low, which they were okay with, to I’d like to burn this place down…which, frankly, I’m surprised was one of the options."

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Bronze badge
Joke

Re: Morale

"The whippings will continue until morale improves"

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WTF?

"We can't boil an ocean?"

Surely a new one from the business lexicon of bullshit? Why can't management speak plain English anymore?

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Holmes

Re: "We can't boil an ocean?"

Because then it would be obvious to all us scrubbers that they have no bloody idea what they're doing.

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Bronze badge
WTF?

Re: "We can't boil an ocean?"

...but if a Government ITT asked us to do that, we would come up with a very competitive price.

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Tis simple

They don't speak plain English because if they did, they'd give away the fact that they're clueless to the core, and know deep down that their value to the company in real terms is somewhat lower than the recent graduate coders.

That's all management speak is; pretentious terminology, idiotic analogies, verbing [1] nouns ('spend' as a noun is something I'd like to see punished with a summary clip round the ear) and frequent use of acronyms and soundbites all in an attempt to make themselves seem more important than they really are.

[1] Oops.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "We can't boil an ocean?"

Course they can't boil an ocean. They can't even boil a f$£%ing egg.

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FAIL

'certain contracts had "delivery and margin challenges".'

In other words they have taken on conrtracts that won't deliver a profit and so they blame all the staff. I bet they won't undertake a review of how those 'challenges' actually occured...

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Gold badge
Unhappy

@Just a geek

"In other words they have taken on conrtracts that won't deliver a profit and so they blame all the staff. I"

Not necessarily.

It *could* be they took on con-tracts where the client (or "mark" as I like to think of them) wised up that con-sultants have deliberately screwed up the analysis so they can make up what they underbid on the contract with change request charges.

Only this time it didn't work. No trebles all round. No bonuses and no "seminars" to the Seychelles.

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Mushroom

Can't boil an ocean?

I just want them to be able to read emails and document the issue correctly, I don't want them to boil an ocean.

Or, when attempting to solve my issues, ask me to try something I've already tried that didn't work.

Or ask me to do something that I've already explained isn't possible or practical.

Or tell me it's something I've already proved it isn't and explained fully my methods and reasoning.

Or pass it further up only to go through all the above again and again.

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Anonymous Coward

Anything but a 'great place to work'

Complete shower of sh1t!

IF/when the economy picks up the exodus will cause a vacuum the size of a black hole.

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Bronze badge

Re: 'a vacuum the size of a black hole.'

I wouldn't apply for a job at an astronomy lab. (Maybe your brains have been boiled by all that management cant?)

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Anything but a 'great place to work'

I know, I've worked for them. I wouldn't say they are pond life, but that's only because the comparison would be unfair to comparatively appealing and intelligent mud-dwelling invertebrates.

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Bronze badge
WTF?

only dish out bonuses that are "contractual entitlements"

If they are contractual entitlements, are they really bonuses?

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Anonymous Coward

Vile organisation; vile management

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