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back to article Police mirth after plastic plod puts out call for 'PC World'

A plastic plod was left red faced after issuing a call to other forces to find a Police Constable World. The mistake was made when the Police Community Support Officer (PCSO) was skimming through evidence and found what she thought was the officer's name attached to a bundle of cash. In actuality, the money was seized at the …

COMMENTS

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Anonymous Coward

Blame it on the educational system and the way the Police recruitment team work.

No wonder innocent people get locked up.

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Anonymous Coward

No wonder innocent guilty people get locked up set free.

Fixed it.

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Anonymous Coward

> Blame it on the educational system

Yeah of course. I mean in my day you were taught the names of every retailer when you were 5.

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> guilty people get set free.

Doesn't "set free" presuppose that plod managed to catch them in the first place?

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"Fixed it"

No, it still needs correction.

"No wonder guilty people Daily Mail readers get set free believe what it prints."

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FAIL

Re: "Fixed it"

Your point would be valid if people didn't have lots of experience of the police and know this is exactly the sort of thing they do. It is believed because it aligns with peoples own personal experiences.

Ignoring everything the Daily Mail prints has the same validity as any broadbrush decision based on a grouping. Yes, some of what they print is dubious, but the sames true of other papers as well. You need to look at each individual story rather than just saying 'Daily Mail - rubbish'. That's the sort of prejudiced approach that people like you attribute to Daily Mail readers and yet you show exactly the same!!

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "Fixed it"

> "just saying 'Daily Mail - rubbish'. That's the sort of prejudiced approach that people like you attribute to Daily Mail readers and yet you show exactly the same!!

Well, maybe (s)he *is* a Daily Mail reader.

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FAIL

Criminal Activity

And people wonder why crime is such an issue and the police are incapable of catching anyone, even if it happens right in front of them. I'm glad the police and the civvies that work for them find this hilarious. Undoubtedly, they fine recent crime statistics equally so and find it very funny how they are allowed to keep drawing salaries for such a poor service.

Police in my area have been carrying out a zero tolerance towards riding bikes on the pavement for some time now. Having your house burgled will result in a crime number and a suggestion you contact your insurers, as all the plod are chasing major criminals riding on the pavement.

You couldn't make it up if you tried.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Criminal Activity

You have to go out onto the streets to catch criminals, seems some of the Police can't even do that:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-20384509

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Re: Criminal Activity

Too busy working on 'intelligence' I imagine. After all; it takes a long time to read the paper, a few lads mags and maybe (if were really lucky) some intelligence reports on criminals. You know somethings wrong when more money is being spent on behind the scenes than at the front.

When they eventually decide to do something, it normally involves their firearms teams running around like the 'Professionals'. That, of course, is when they're not accidently discharging weapons or shooting themselves/others as has happened a few times. I've watched quite a few programs on the 'crack' police firearms squads and never cease to be amazed by their inability. I've also met a load running around London being macho. If you ever come across them; get as far away as possible as quickly as possible.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Criminal Activity

'As quickly as possible'

Previous events may suggest that may be ill-advised.

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Re: Criminal Activity

You may be right. Given some armed police seem more than a little trigger happy, doing anything quickly might look like guilt to them.

Difference between the police and Tony Martin is that they shout at you before shooting. That ensures you turn around and get the round in the front. A round in the back never looks good.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Criminal Activity

Police in my area have been carrying out a zero tolerance towards riding bikes on the pavement for some time now.

wish they'd do it in Islington, damn near impossible to walk anywhere without getting run down

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Re: Criminal Activity

Different areas, different issues. Bikes on pavements might be an issue in some places, but not really in mine. Most of the time, its kids riding them slowly alongside their mates (walking) on the way to school. You've got some kid going only just fast enough to stay upright to avoid leaving his mates behind and the oldies constantly bang on about them being an danger. 'Can't get past them on the pavement' etc. Well, if they were all walking, it wouldn't be any better!! The fact they're cycling is besides the point and doesn't add any danger.

Problem with listening to the populace (or a crime commissioner), is that they have a single biased view of what the issues area. If a crime commissioner gets burgled, they'll probably immediately call on the police to do more on this type of crime, but it may not be a general issue. In my area, there are so many old people around, they constantly moan about bikes. Should try driving behind one of them when they go for a cycle on the road. Terrible.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Criminal Activity

Isn't the bike on pavement thing normally being pushed by elderly Mail readers who have a desperate need to grind down who they hope are "uppity proles" but don't realise that some of us might be looking out for them later on their bikes when we are in our own overpowered tin boxes? ;)

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Criminal Activity

I mean the type that gaze at the sky for minutes on end apparently in a daydream, you see them miles away and cruise carefully past them, then after they wake up, they eventually decide they must have been "in terrible danger". And then plod after you at maximum shuffle-velocity and try to give you a piece of their mind, on your ownproperty....unfortunate if you live nearby!

To be fair, I did live not far from a psychiatric hospital, hard to tell the daycare ones and the Mail readers apart However, the daycare ones were generally regarded by those in the know as being harmless and generally well-intentioned ;)

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Re: Criminal Activity

It's a bit of both. There are certainly a lot of old people in my area and what they regard as danger takes some believing. Anything they don't see/hear coming is immediately a cause for concern. There have been a few collisions and even a death or two. However, at least one was from someone walking into a cycle lane. It's a case of both parties taking care. Pedestrians keeping an eye out and not overreacting to every little thing. Also, cyclists being sensible and there are certainly a few who do speed around on the pavements at too high a speed, especially around corners.

However, no matter how you look at it; first priority on crime it is not. Yep, stop some of the silly cyclists who go too fast or without due care for others. Also, tell some of the pedestrians that just because they didn't hear the bike coming, that doesn't make it dangerous or the cyclists fault. Maybe they should turn the hearing aid up!!

I can't believe so much police time is spent on such a relatively trivial thing.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Criminal Activity

Yeah possibly it was my silent but deadly cycling style that freaked her, it was a hybrid road/mountain bike that glided pretty well with no fuss or mad pedalling .... probably nearly out of sight before the elder one realised I had even been there!

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Anonymous Coward

Time to raise the standards for being a Police officer again.

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"999 whats the emergency?"

"I've been burgled by a woman known as Amanda Huggenkiss"

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Anonymous Coward

Or the old favourites, get them to phone anywhere (pub?) for Hugh Jarse,

or the number for the Zoo and Mr C Lyon.... or Mr Rory Lyons (not related) ...

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Coat

Good thing the printer was working,

otherwise a call would have gone out for PC Load Letter.

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Megaphone

From the Daily Mail

According to the blog the source of the article is the Daily Mail.

I think you can work out the reliability for yourself.

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Anonymous Coward

Sounds about right

Some years ago, we had a badly damaged SUV dumped in our office car park one night, so the boss called the police and reported it.

Two PCSO turned up, wrote down the details, left a crime number, and went away again.

Two weeks later the boss rang up to see what was happening and was told the vehicle was of no interest to them, and we should make our own arrangements to dispose of it.

As the scrap man dragged the SUV onto his wagon, a small, soggy cardboard box was revealed. The box contained gold bracelets - lots of them.

The boss rang again. Blue lights. Car park, scrap lorry and SUV fenced off with tape. Dozens of cops and two very pissed off SOC officers on the scene. Hard disk from our CCTV recorder (72 hour loop) impounded. Employees interviewed...

It turned out the SUV had been used to ram-raid a wholesale jewellers and the police had been searching for the vehicle.

As one SOC officer put it: "They couldn't catch a fucking cold!"

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Re: Sounds about right

I'm amazed they realised when then!!

That's the problem with CSI dramas from the states. It makes people believe the police can actually perform to that level. Maybe true in the US; I've no experience. if the UK, it's rare to even see SOC officers anywhere near anything other than major crime, let alone useful things like house breaking etc. After all, it's much easier to give the criminal a discounted term if they admit to loads more and help the crime cleanup rate.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sounds about right

That isn't entirely fair... My house was broken in to a number of times and the SOC guys came each time and dutifully covered everything in fingerprint dust. From what I could tell the police did everything they could, the judge just gave the kid a slap on the wrist.

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Re: Sounds about right

I'm sure it varies from place to place and also how busy they are at the time. Did the kid admit to loads of other stuff as well as your break-ins? Might be the reason for a slap rather than prison time............

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sounds about right

Could be worse, I used to work in a place where the office got burgled before I atarted with them, , they actually did find the guy (maybe by coincidence and traced owners of random gear) they nicked him and jailed him (woohoo!), they kept the IT gear as evidence for years, lead seals and everything, then returned it when it was obsolete! I had to check out the gear, seems the guy had a Prince Of Persia obsession, weird? plus also raced 3/4 scale cars that used the same motor as my m/cycle at the time. I made sure to lock it up well after that...

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xyz
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Devil

Remember this was a PCSO which isn't a copper

It's a plastic, cheapo copper thingy that looks like a copper, acts like a copper, but aren't trained like a copper...that can't and don't do very much, but they are cheaper (key word that). And remember, this was an "experienced" one. This is what you get when you try to increase police visibility without using police. PCSOs one rung up the evolutionary tree from "Traffic Officers" which are basically highway workmen in a tricked out truck that looks like a cop car. I think there's an old saying about payments, monkeys and peanuts...what was it?

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Rob
Bronze badge
Joke

Re: Remember this was a PCSO which isn't a copper

I know the phrase you mean, but makes more sense here if it were, "you pay a monkey peanuts and all you're left with is shit being thrown around."

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Re: Remember this was a PCSO which isn't a copper

Traffic Officers at least are full police officers, but specialise in traffic enforcement, PCSO's are shopping centre security guards with the same legal rights of arrest and detention as a packet of crisps

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Thumb Up

Re: Remember this was a PCSO which isn't a copper

I think xyz was referring to the civilian Traffic Officers that are employed by the Highways Agency to patrol the motorways in Range Rovers to put cones around accidents, protect broken down car passengers etc. Not the actual Traffic Police who chase stolen cars and all that cool stuff.

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xyz
Bronze badge

Re: Remember this was a PCSO which isn't a copper

As yer man below says...Traffic Officers are actually HATOs, that is Highways Agency Traffic officers. They may look like coppers in their Tonka toys, but they are sweeper uppers o' rubbish. Binmen on wheels basically.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Remember this was a PCSO which isn't a copper

My son calls them "Traffic Wombles" caus they have to clean up after accidents

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Anonymous Coward

its obvious that the mistake is down to PC being Police Constable

So she was reading police constable world rather than PC world.

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Coat

Oblig.

Can't we get you on mastermind? Specialist subject - pointing out the bleedin' obvious?

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Ahhh

I see, I didn't get the story until you explained it.

It's as well it wasn't a dry cleaners, the money might have been earmarked for laundering.

Or if it was a Renault garage, the money might have been labelled DCi Megane.

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Anonymous Coward

And had no concept of probability or ever leafed through a local phone directory. Mmm reassuring.

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This post has been deleted by its author

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Coat

Very disappointed

no one has mentioned Mike Hunt yet

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Oh FFS people make mistakes with acronyms/initials.

It's a silly one, but honestly tell me you have never made a silly mistake expanding an acronym? I know some older people who use LOL as Lots of Love, for instance. IT types are particularly immersed in TLA's yet (shock horror) other industries also use TLA's for different things. Just because the PCSO happens to think of PC meaning one thing rather than the thing we all think of first is hardly cause for 'all plod are thickies'. It was a silly mistake, it was quite funny, that is it.

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Facepalm

Re: Oh FFS people make mistakes with acronyms/initials.

Those older folks wouldn't be Little Old Ladies, by any chance?

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FAIL

Re: Oh FFS people make mistakes with acronyms/initials.

I might be inclined to agree, but hot on the heels of this:-

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tees-20316578

you might think otherwise. After all, known domestic bully, shotguns etc.etc. What could go wrong? Now, I'm sure this decision wasn't made by a PCSO.

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Re: Oh FFS people make mistakes with acronyms/initials.

"older people who use LOL as Lots of Love, for instance"

On FidoNet, which preceded the internet, LOL was "Lots Of Love." lol was "Laughed Out Loud."

Also you could capitalise one or two words to provide emphasis without some knob taking offence and complaining that you were 'shouting'

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Anonymous Coward

Have you seen this man?

I'm trying to locate Prawo Jazdy , who has several outstanding motoring convictions.

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Happy

Re: Have you seen this man?

I remember that one... the old Garda Sicini certainly had egg on their face over THAT one. :-)

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Happy

We're only human...(some of the time)

Reminds me of some of the old account applications seen in the past completed and signed by Mr M Mouse or Mr D Duck.

Won't embarrass people by saying who got conned......

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Anonymous Coward

Re: We're only human...(some of the time)

On a slightly unrelated note, I had a senior-ish bank dude phone up and ask if he could be given a different mainframe login, I believe they were meant to be based on surname, initials and so on. Took ages for me to twig why he might be offended by QUIA ;)

Unfortunately I had already gone down the road of "I don't see what''s wrong with that, looks standard to me....." .... and clearly he wasn't going to say why he didn't like it!

Then there was the other manager who obviously had a really cute lady assistant and both seemed positively chuffed that her mainframe login ID was verging on obscene! In fact I think they were requesting that all her future logins were based on this "special" first one!

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Anonymous Coward

Re: We're only human...(some of the time)

QUIA?

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Bronze badge

Seeing as we've all been victims of recruiters...

..."experienced" does not equal "good". It means "has been around a long time".

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