back to article Microsoft Surface sales numbers revealed as SHOCKINGLY HIDEOUS

Microsoft's shares took a beating following its gloomy fiscal 2013 earnings report earlier this month, in which it wrote down nearly a billion dollars on its unloved Surface RT fondleslabs. But the software giant isn't out of the woods yet, because new details have emerged that have the full Surface picture looking even worse …

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  1. feanor

    The basic problem is that Microsoft has spent its time releasing mediocre ( sometimes just crap) products into a market it had, by fair means or foul, captured decades ago.

    It then releases a mediocre product into a competitive market place and arrogantly assumed that the drones would shell out for it in their millions without including brain in the process. It works for Windows! They just don't understand it.....

  2. W.O.Frobozz

    You can tell that Microsoft has been forced to scale down their usual astroturfing given all the "Anonymous Cowards" posting blinkered pro-Microsoft nonsense. Guess the cheques were a lot smaller this month, they can't even be bothered to register "Steve Barkto" and pretend they're something other than a ham-fisted PR agency.

    Personally I can't wait to see Microfail's Q1 results next year after the Xbone leaves a nice smokey crater in Xmas sales.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Personally I can't wait to see Microfail's Q1 results next year after the Xbone leaves a nice smokey crater in Xmas sales."

      erm - you know Xbox One already sold out ?

  3. Mr. Peterson

    the whale that is MS may produce the occasional steaming pile of Ambergris, but never a mere turd

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Holmes

      "Ambergris" used be sellable at premium prices, man.

      It is also as illegal as child pr0nz in the US, for all the wrong reasons.

      This Microsoft stuff is not like that at all.

  4. JimmiShrode

    Microsoft is Passe

    When faced with a choice of an Apple product or Android Based Product vs the Surface--no one wants the Surface. Just as Zune was a doomed MP3 player--so is Surface doomed. With the debacle of Windows Vista and now the repeat debacle of Windows 8--you must be wondering if Steve Ballmer is even the right choice to lead a company that has become harder to turn than the Queen Mary. Windows everywhere is not something the people want. In the corporate sector--the trust of Microsoft has severely eroded. Many IT Departments do not have the money to spend on Buggy products that keep coming out with a new interface every few years. The business sector likes a standard interface that doesn't require costly new training every 3 years. Poor Windows wants to be a consumer product and a business product--and they haven't done either very well.

  5. jmk89

    I will take a free surface

    You can show me ads and make money of that, deal Microsoft?

  6. Robert E A Harvey

    The other lesson

    People seem to have missed the other lesson.

    According to the Reg story figures Microsoft spent over a thousand dollars in advertising to earn each $600 sale.

    Just remember that next time an ad agency is making a pitch for their attempt to sell your product, and ask them how come they can be so clever when they weren't even clever enough to get the Surface RT account.

    Advertising pays? pah! No such thing as bad publicity? Pshaw!

  7. Someone Else Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    An encouraging word (no pun intended)

    Microsoft managed to mow through an $898m marketing budget in just eight calendar months – and consumers still didn't take the bait.

    Give me some hope that this society we live in isn't a complete waste.

  8. Chris Reynolds

    I like it

    I don't get the hate. Most of the people who I speak to who don't like them haven't tried them. My wife bought one. When her friends saw it in use, a number have gone out and bought one, giving the iPad to the kids.

    In my opinion, Microsoft should have focussed on the business market. If it had been able to integrate with AD and had had Outlook from the get-go then businesses would have lapped them up (we would have). When people learned to love them at work, I reckon they would have 'done a Blackberry (circa 1999)' and gained an image as the tablet of choice for professionals.

  9. DrXym

    Not surprising at all

    Surface RT - expensive, gimped, not a proper version of Windows

    Surface Pro - VERY expensive, a full x86 Windows but hot, heavy and short lifed due to ill-chosen CPU

    Windows can work extremely well on tablets. OEMs like Asus, Lenovo et al have demonstrated very compelling devices built around Atom processors which don't compromise battery or size but still deliver full Windows. Give it an iteration more of the hardware and software and I think Microsoft will be onto a winner - providing they've learned their lesson.

  10. Dylan Fahey
    Facepalm

    I don't want to alarm anyone!

    I don't want to alarm anyone, but there are starving kids on this planet and these redmond assholes are spending a billion on advertising. Here's a clue. If your product is good and worthy, it will sell itself.

    A brown kid in Africa approves this message.

  11. strangelybrown

    A little postscript... why Surface RT/Pro will continue to bomb.

    Nearly launched the Lenovo ThinkPad Tablet II (catchy, huh?) across the room, thanks to Windows 8 being a pile of unutterably half-arsed tripe. Given this is exactly the same environment as a Surface Pro, I'm amazed anyone thinks the following is in any way representative of an awesome operating system.

    My Sennheiser MM450x bluetooth headset packed up, so they sent me a new one, which arrived today. Obviously I need to delete old pairing and create new connection on iPad and the Lenovo.

    iPad first; Wake device. Stab Settings>Bluetooth>MM450>Forget Device>Bluetooth and then pair to the new ones. Took all of 30 seconds end to end.

    Lenovo next. Wake device, slide out charm>Settings>Devices>MM450x>Remove Device /pause for 3 minutes/>Add new device>pair new 'phones. 'Device Paired' then 'Device not connected, please use Bluetooth manager', so out of settings back to tiles. stab desktop. find BT manager, double tap. As BT manager thinks it is connected to the Sennys, it doesn't launch the manager per se, but simply tells me the device is not paired. Microsoft loop then ensues where I flick between desktop and the tetchy BT manager and tiles/settings/devices unpairing/pairing/deleting the damn things. Gave up after 10 minutes.

    Honestly, I'm beginning to wonder if Microsoft are actually a front for the KGB or SMERSH and are planning on slowly killing the world with software that's 63% functional.

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