Cats on the other hand ...
Cats, of course, are evil and therefore use Windows phones.
In a development which was perhaps inevitable, a canine lyceum in New York has started offering classes in which dogs are taught to "use" iPads. According to an in-depth report on Today.com, doggy pedagogue Anna Jane Grossman ("who had recently left journalism to pursue dog training full-time") was inspired to offer fondleslab …
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I would say rather this sounds like somebody who knows everything about ipad dog owners in New York City.
However, I agree I was terribly surprised this wasn't satire.
Also, I don't think you can just "give a child a fucking iPad to entertain themselves" either. You should in fact interact with children as well as your pets. hahahaha
I let the dogs take care of the children and nobody gets a technological advantage. I've structured their lives in a series with unlockable achievements.
They have to kill a mammal either barehanded or with improvised weaponry to unlock the iPad. Other challenges exist as well, once the oldest learns to walk I fully expect it will be trying to scale the ice wall to get the Masserati. Its mother drives one and I can feel the acquisitiveness emanating from it every time it sees her through the viewing window.
The only rule is that the children can't harm one another to complete a challenge and teamwork is rewarded with double rewards. So it's safe and installs a sense of family. The biggest one just unlocked the unlimited pacifier reward by being able to pick it up all by itself!
So what does she train the dogs to do with the iPad?
I think the "New Yorker" explained that one a while back, I have this cartoon on my office wall. (Perfectly SFW, for those who worry).
They have no concept of abstraction so trying to get them to respond to a screen respresentation of anything is like expecting them to look at where you're pointing and not your finger. So WTF is really expected to come out of this?
Except separating the credulous from their monies of course.
"I really like to teach things you can do sitting on your couch with a glass of wine," she enthused. "It should be something that's enjoyable, because in the end, it's about spending time with your dogs."
In my experience, dogs behave badly enough without giving them wine. So, down with this sort of thing!
How about training dogs to poo on whatever tablets the owners don't like?
fanbois get their dogs trained to poo on Samsungs.
fandroids pay to have their dogs pee on iPads.
That was a joke. But... seriously, the mind boggles at some dog owners.
Ever seen thirty-something ladies walk their Dachshunds in high-end doggie strollers? A sight to behold ;-)