Nonsense
"It's either DRM or nothing at all."
The statement makes no sense! No other BBC broadcasts use DRM. My home recordings don't "self destruct". I can record any programmes at broadcast stream quality onto my DVD recorder and, if I wanted to, duplicate and sell these worldwide. I don't; and I'm sure if it was widespread, we would have heard about it.
The iplayer stream quality is poor by comparison. No one will want to use it as a pirated source. Be realistic, it's about control.
As for what player to use: The BBC have been years "developing" iplayer.... what have they actually been doing, saving up our pennies to give to M$?
In the time that's been available, there has been time to produce a multi-platform player from scratch.