Presumably then, if you take the "I'd prefer to be patted down" option, they can't object if you get your cock out.

I think I might apply for this.

£10 an hour to waggle my cock at people of an evening sounds an easier way to bring in extra cash than flogging my old tat on eBay.

"And now a word for those people who do not consider shining laser pointers into the eyes of pilots of landing 747s as a problem. If you are not a pilot or are not involved with aviation, your opinion is worthless and utterly irrelevant - you are ignorant of the subject."

You pompous arse! I am not associated with aviation, yet I can understand that a dazzled pilot is a BAD THING, as is a dazzled driver, or a dazzled motorcyclist. More lives at stake in a plane, yet still potential death is involved in all cases.

The point here is whether or not shining a laser at a pilot can causes him -- ever -- to lose total control of his aircraft. Or whether or not he tips his head to one side, after a dazzling flash in one eye, then blinks, and all normality is restored.

The question of relevance of expert opinion is not one for an aviation expert to answer -- it's for an ophthalmologist to answer.

And notice that stating that the risks are overstated is NOT to be confused with stating that there is no risk at all.

It's a laudable sentiment you have: to go with free software. But there's only one problem with free applications: They're shit.

I tried so hard to like Open Office, but ultimately had to go back to Redmond's bloat to do achieve everything I wanted. I desparately wanted The GIMP to be as powerful as Photoshop, but it's way behind (and needs to lose that terrible name). I wanted Windows Movie Maker to be as good as Adobe Premier Pro, but all I ended up with were high school YouTube clips. They're all shit.

But it's even worse if you pay for something and the rug is whipped out from under your feet by version changes, updates and obsolescence. Best to get something which does what you need, and stick it on a stand alone machine, on a stable OS version which is not connected to the internet...

I've got Office 2003 on Windows NT with Photoshop and Premier on a lovely little box with no outside connectivity and it just sort of does what it needs to do without updating itself into a state of non-function. I find it quite sweet that it has no idea about the outside world and calmly believes itself to be still current, so does what it does with a smile. My electric drill and my lawnmower aren't on the internet, and they still do what they did when I bought them, so why shouldn't my other tools?

However, in summary, the whole world is shit.