Posts by Alan Esworthy

Fsck Yeah!

As a voting Merkin, I say that the rest of the presidential candidates are just as crazy or crazier but hide it better. They're also more dangerous to me, my family, the U.S., not to mention the rest of the world.

So, YES, I'll vote for him.

Fidget training seminars coming soon

We suspect it might be quite hard to fidget deliberately at exactly the same level as you do when you’re not feeling guilty.

I suspect it might be quite easy to learn to fidget deliberately at a constant level regardless of whether or not you're feeling guilty.

For those unable to exercise such a demanding level of self-control, perhaps a packet of live crab lice dumped down the Y-fronts would do the trick.

Here, here!

Hic, hic!

random thought

How about a little variety/uncertainty to spice it up a bit?

Beer in SP(substr("AAAAAAAAAAAAAA",1,int(rnd()*10+2)CE!

Warning to those new on the employment market

The bosses may tell you it's biotech, but it's really just another crap factory job.

local effect, global hype

Read the paper. The authors describe the increased mobility of the glaciers under study as a local effect. In fact, nearby is another glacier where temperatures are below normal (another local effect).

Alarmists take this local effect and scream about it being part of a global pattern when there is absolutely no support for such an assertion. Can you imagine what the well-paid warmist propaganda mill would say if anyone focused on that other, cooler, region and crowed that it was a sign that global warming was untrue?

Move along. There really is very little to see here.

Musk credibility own goal

I greatly admire Elon Musk -- and wish he had better judgment. On the one hand, he decries as unwarranted govt intervention in the marketplace when NJ mandates dealership franchise sales. On the other hand, Tesla and SpaceX both make out very well indeed from govt intervention in the marketplace.

expanded horizons

I'd like to see those two write an inmate inventory auditing system. They'd likely determine that there were two extraneous inmates in the system who would have to be released to reconcile the difference.

Power Frisbee

This was exciting only in the aftermath. Many years ago when I was a lowly midnight shift computer operator at a bank, the four of us on duty would fill some of the empty time by tossing round tape canister lids around the computer room like Frisbee discs. We did this, anyway, until I skipped a lid off the top of the 2540 card reader/punch after which it sailed into the big POWER OFF button on the front panel of the IBM 360/40 that was most of the way through the nightly 6-hour demand deposit account update batch run. We did recover by deadline, but just barely.

for the greater good

I wonder if it is possible to capture enough water from the breath of blow-hard politicians to drown them?

lock/unlock?

As penises and nipples both undergo dimensional and morphological changes when suitably stimulated, this raises the question of whether or not Apple's software can determine the same body part independent of said body part's engorgement or surface moisture level. If not, then choosing the excitement level for unlocking becomes very important for fanboi (and girl) wankers.

Order

Elop knows the order: pillage first, then burn.

You all assume a ewe when he might have fancied the wether.

Value!

Oh good. We have "researchers" who blithely admit being hampered by insufficient information building models of models whose characteristics are unknown. I do see the value in that, yes indeed.

Why?

"Hmm. I wonder why I just removed my underwear," she said.

For a faster fix...

...Copy your monthly Xerox bill on their faulty gear. You've got a 50-50 chance any error will reduce the total you pay. Spend the difference at the pub.

arrogant judge

Judge Chin's arrogance is showing. If a piece of legislation is flawed it is the job of the legislative body that crafted it in the first place to fix it. Each and every judge, heck, each and every individual, can make up his own idea of the "spirit" of a law but there is no authority to appeal to for saying just what that spirit is save the legislators who wrote it and voted for it. Chin's job is to hear evidence for and against the proposition that some party has violated a law or has damaged another party, not to impose his own creative view of what the law should mean.

Abuzz with excitement

I'll be following your progress online and will try for the streamed launch and chase video. Who will be operating the Digital Instrumentation Laboratory and Downrange Observatory? I'm sure she's quivering with anticipation.

Gin: miracle material

Gin is truly miraculous! We've long used it to help us forget, and now we find we can use it to help us remember.

How does it know?!