Posts by TheRobster

"SQL injection has been used for a long time and, in all honesty, shouldn’t be possible these days"

Yeah, that.

It might have pissed you off but...

...it worked, for me at least. Before this week, I'd never heard of the site, and I loved some of my old games. Now, I'm looking forward to the relaunch to see what they have available.

I hope they have TIE Fighter. I never could get that working in XP.

Translation

What she said:

"But good friends are the people who tell you if your face is dirty."

What she meant:

"But good friends are the people who stab you in the front."

What this really means:

"Feck off, I want your high profile position, but I'm trying to sound nice about it"

Woah, woah, woah

Ok, let's not get ahead of ourselves here. First things first: 3D in films or on TV or on any screen is bollocks, seriously. In fact, it's not really 3D, it's an optical trick because lets face it, it's still being presented on a 2D medium. Until I can smack the lead character upside the head, or actually use my hands to control the UI instead of a mouse or other controller, then sorry guys it's not worth the effort.

You WHAT?!?

"Then you receive a magic key, an RFID chip, through the post, in exchange for £3. Then you pay a £1 a day to access the scheme and then pay again to hire the bike - charges start at £1 for an hour, although the first 30 minutes are free."

So if you were in this scheme for a year and NEVER USED A BIKE, it'd cost you £368?!? I'm sorry, but Boris can fuck right off. You can buy a cheap bike from Tesco for like £60 ffs.

The only problem is...

A while ago, the BBC basically proved that the "average" graduate, if there is such a thing, already pays something along the lines of £500,000 more taxes over a lifetime than a non-graduate, through increased income tax due to higher average salary, buying more therefore paying more VAT etc.

So graduates ALREADY pay more tax than others, and they want to tax them again?

Riiiiiiiiiiight...

So what he's saying is that at some point, during the next month, at least one corporate network, /somewhere in the world/ is going to suffer connectivity issues.

Well fuck me, what a leap of deductive reasoning.

In other news, popes shit in the woods, bears are catholic, etc. ad infinitum.

A title.

"drink ten pints instead, and then convince yourself that you had a vision of driving around London with a couple of flapping plastic England flags outside yer motor's window, celebrating the moment in which our beloved, overpaid, national team didn't screw it up in the penalty box. "

Amen to that!

You know what this is, don't you?

Apple are doing this to test your faith, they want to know just how badly you want an iPad. Basically, which do you value more: the prospect of iPad ownership, or your soul and possibly sanity?

Cue jokes about the relationship between sanity and desire to own an iPad.

Further uses...

I really hope this does not extent to building / maintaining airport runways, else the Pope is in real trouble.

Or does the new one not do the kissing the ground but when he gets off a plane?

Black-opter due to the lack of Pope-plane icon.

We don't need no steenking titles...

Quote: "...this has given me an excellent experience for the 'coming' campaign"

Well, quite.

Seriously

When your child pays more attention to a 5 year old cartoon pig than they do to you, their parent, that's not the cartoons fault.

Surely...

...the title should be:

NZ GAL'S BULGARIAN AIRBAGS FAIL TO HALT TRAFFIC

All I hear in mewling

Dear Sir,

I don't ordinarily read this publication, It's not my type of thing, you know. I prefer cats and so forth. However, despite this I must confess to being flabbergasted that there is absolutely no feline content within this article whatsoever. Come to that, I think I've read every article posted today and, well this month really, in the hope of seeing something, anything about cats but to no avail. I feel that I must protest in the strongest manner.

Despite the title of the article clearly stating the content is about "foot ball", I must admit that I still clicked the link with a sense of levity, confident that this time I would find some pussy-cat related pics. But no, imagine my sense of distress when instead of the furry feline fun I was clearly (not) promised by the title of the article, I instead find inane mumblings about a sportsman with his boots on the wrong feet. I mean, "FOOTIE FANS FLOCK TO CLOCK 'MISS OF THE CENTURY", how can that possibly have nothing to do with cats?

Frankly I'm disgusted. I feel completely mislead by the writer of this article and the whole publication all together. A friend of mine told me "The internet's all about pussy" and I honestly think this should be the case. Captions about food are optional.

Until your publication makes significant moves in this direction, I'm afraid I shall not read any more. Apart from all the time, so I can complain about the lack of cats.

I remain, sir,

Disgusted of Braintree.

----------------------------------

In other news, some people don't like football, and feel the need to tell just about EVERYBODY.

Good for them.

Job Description

How does one go about getting the job of "Comedy-explosions Correspondent", and what qualifies one for the job? Explosive wit? Devastating good looks? A burning desire for the facts? Ebullient personality? Booming great laugh?

With all that in mind, how did Lewis get the job?

And when do I start?