* Posts by ukgnome

2085 publicly visible posts • joined 16 Jun 2011

UK retailers in TABLET PRICE SLASH BONANZA

ukgnome

Re: Big name no guarantee

>>now the OS burns up battery even when it's off

Have you been drinking? Read that back for me.

You've been drinking haven't you!

Robox: How good could a sub-£1k 3D printer be?

ukgnome

I Think

these earlier generation printers are niche at the moment.

But in ten years it will be the replicator that we all want.

Although I don't think it will be plastic that we are printing.

BOFH: A miracle on PFY Street

ukgnome

Spare a thought

For those of us on call with no way of actually getting to the factory if our phone rang.

Doctor Who's tangerine dream and Clara's death wish in Last Christmas

ukgnome

Oh sweet fuck

a rehash of Amy's choice with a smattering of sci-fi rips offs. The only believable things was Nick Frost's Santa. It was the worst of series eight. And the included deep breath. A 1/10 non starter.

Ghosts of Christmas Past: The long-ago geek gifts that made us what we are

ukgnome

Happy times

I still fire up my tractor, and I use spirit and not one of these new fangled solid fuel ones.

Hilton, Marriott and co want permission to JAM guests' personal Wi-Fi

ukgnome

expensive hotel wireless?????

You guys are going to the wrong hotels.

Or maybe I am going to the right ones.

I have never paid for WiFi in a USA hotel but have been rinsed for cash over in blighty.

Shock! Nork-grating flick The Interview WILL be in cinemas – Sony

ukgnome

>>threatened September 11th-style attacks on anyone who went to see the film.

Turkish army defeated at the gates of Vienna?

Convention of Annapolis opens with the aim of revising the Articles of Confederation?

U.S. marines invade Honduras? (these could be the one maybe)

Death of Janet Parker, war photographer, final victim of smallpox (very sinister)

Biggest one-day plunge on Wall Street?

This is just a snapshot of ON THIS DAY stuff, please can these hackers be a bit less cryptic?

Privacy-loving boxing kangaroo biffs drone out of the sky

ukgnome

this story has fish and chips on it!

Excellent - I want my tech news three days later please.

Don't you guys check out buzzfeed occasionally?

GCHQ: We can't track crims any more thanks to Snowden

ukgnome
Facepalm

Re: So before Snowden...

Well, there are two ways of looking at this.

They are not been spied on, so it's quite OK to chat about this activity in the open.

They are been spied on, so those spy police types will already be running a decipher so lets just chat about this in the open.

ukgnome
Headmaster

Re: A modest proposition

No offence taken

ukgnome

Re: Can they not use their powers for good?

There is so much wrong with that suggestion that I don't know where to start.

BT takes broadband to NEW PLACES. That's right: CITIES

ukgnome

Re: Up?

have a +1

Up speed is as important as down - and there is money in it too.

All those cloudy storage solutions for pictures of cats, dogs in bow ties and bratty kids.

If I had a good upload speed then I would of already bought 1TB of clouds.

Google's first stab at control-free ROBOT car rolls off the line

ukgnome

I was talking to my six year old about robot cars. He had a very modern outlook.

Me - do you think they are a good idea?

Him - Yes, some people can't drive or are far to old to be driving.

Me - some people are scared that they aren't in control though.

Him - then we just teach them that it's OK

Me - who will own the car and maintain it, refuel it?

Him - they will have robot garages that will take care of all that, they will own themselves.

Me - some people might not like it.

Him - some people don't like cabbage but we still grow it.

This technology is for his generation, but has to start with ours

Careful - your helmet might get squashed by a Volvo

ukgnome

It's the ass hat cyclists that want to overtake cars and motorcycles that are the problem.

Here is a hint cyclists, if I have a flashing orange light on the right hand side of my motorcycle, and I am positioned in the centre of the road and sort of half way through overtaking a bus, then what the actual numb fuck are you doing trying to overtake me.

I get that you can nip and zoom, terrific. But please remember that safety is your responsibility too.

Oh, and wear a freaking helmet you helmet!

Hackers pop German steel mill, wreck furnace

ukgnome
Joke

Re: Breaking News

> More importantly, why the fuck does a furnace NEED to be connected at all????

It's not fun been this hot and lonely, that's why

Welsh council rapped for covert spying on sick leave worker

ukgnome

Re: @Joey M0usepad - f'wit in residence

Whilst the troll has obviously eaten well just before Christmas he has a point (of sorts)

It is very difficult to tell if someone is suffering from anxiety or stress by reading their facebook status, and likewise meeting them in the street.

Mental illness isn't like a broken leg or botched boob job. It doesn't have a visual indicator normally. So yeah, the whole hiring of a PI is a pretty useless exercise.

Sorry to hear you have bouts of stress fruitoftheloon, I know that shits real and not many you tell will ever come close to understanding. I wish you good days, fuck the retards!

ukgnome

Re: Early Stage?

The thing is a lot (not all) have a protected income with regards to sick leave. And there is no maximum, or if there is a maximum it's never hit.

The working regulations in the UK are quite different so it wouldn't be a great idea to compare them. As such we don't get sick time (at least I don't)

What I do get though is 30 days holiday, not including public holidays. Paid time off for doctors appointments and a very understanding company that would never dip into facebook to see if I am swinging lead. And NO drug tests!

This is less about privacy and more about productivity. I suspect that we only have a small portion of this story.

Reviewed: LittleBigPlanet 3, Lara Croft's latest raid and more

ukgnome
FAIL

Seems Lara Croft is a big breasted anorexic.

I know it's a game but it's a bit crass and hardly a great advert.

Games developers do know that girls play games too, right?

France says 'non' to UberPop

ukgnome

Re: Paris in a taxi - never again

Paris taxi drivers are a fun breed.

I have never been so enthralled, scared and thrilled all at the same time.

If you have the pleasure can I suggest a slightly drunk one, you won't regret it!

Human hair will soon be found on moon: Brit astronauts aim for Space

ukgnome

Re: celebrity rockstar physicist Brian Cox

Lets be clear here - D Ream is not a rock band.

therefore Prof Cox has never been a rockstar.

Dr May has been a rock star - maybe Brid-Aine Parnell is getting confused.

ukgnome

celebrity rockstar physicist Brian Cox

rockstar?

ROCKSTAR?

what blithering halfwit thinks that?

BT to gobble EE for £12.5bn – BTEE phone home

ukgnome

And meanwhile in the Norfolk Broads we still cannot get a phone signal.

*strictly speaking not true, but I am so fed up of climbing the 30ft scaffolding tower to text my mum.

El Reg's mighty rocket spaceplane Vulture 2 arrives in US of A

ukgnome
Paris Hilton

I don't mind the big box

obvs --------->

Uber surge pricing kicks in during Sydney siege

ukgnome

Re: Erm...

Just don't put it behind a paywall - that's illegal now in Blighty.

And a question - is this a siege like in Alpha Papa?

Swiss McDonalds serves up no-holes-barred cheesy action to punters

ukgnome

It's nice that hamburglar still has a job

Are you a Geek Dad/Uncle/Mum/Aunt? Ten Techy Gifts for kids this Xmas

ukgnome

I find myself

shopping for solids of constant width and its 0730 on a Sunday.

I'm sure this has meaning.

Real Ale TWATS: In SPAAAACE, no one can churn your cream

ukgnome

I skimmed the article

all te mention of beer distracted squirrel

BOFH: Capo di tutti capi, bah. I'm having CHICKEN JALFREZI

ukgnome

I give it a week

It won't last. Gina will soon end up been arrested for fraud.

UK flights CRIPPLED by system outage that shut ALL London airspace

ukgnome

Yippee-ki-yay

Someone call John McClane

This week it rained in San Francisco and the power immediately blew out. Your tech utopia

ukgnome

Surely the headline should be

Silicon valley - We just turned it off and back on again.

Is it a good time to tell the folk of SF that this is merely a bit of drizzle?

El Reg Redesign - leave your comment here.

ukgnome
Mushroom

I can't find the kill it with fire button.

Car-crash IT: HUGE write-off for Universal Credit - PAC

ukgnome

Whilst I shouldn't speak for all commentards I do believe all of us saw this coming.

Virgin Media's ad fibs EXPOSED by bitter rival BT

ukgnome

Isn't this the advertising version of my dads bigger than yours?

I'm surprised that Virgin didn't respond with - yo momma

Amazon comes over all eBay with new ‘make an offer’ facility

ukgnome
Trollface

I believe this is how HMRC asks Amazon for tax.

97% of UK gets 'basic' 2Mbps broadband. 'Typical households' need 10Mbps – Ofcom

ukgnome

Who cares about download?

It's no good having a 2MB download speed when you can't back anything up because your upload speed is pants.

Portland lobs fair-trade gluten-free artisan SUEBALL at Uber

ukgnome

Uber is quite pants

I recently carried out a comparison between Uber and a local firm.

Hotel to train station via a local firm was £4.50

Hotel to train station via Uber was a baffling £13

I don't think the little guys need to worry

RIP Ralph Baer: Father of the games console dies aged 92

ukgnome
Thumb Up

Hope to see your like respawn

Bless the chap that brought gaming to the living room.

I only had the pleasure of a Simon, I actually still have it and it works!

Let us hope that some young chaps reading this are inspired enough to create, adapt and enthral.

MP caught playing Candy Crush at committee meeting: I'll ‘try’ not to do it again

ukgnome

Who would of thunk that an MP was a filthy fudge fingerer?

(yes yes I know that fudge isn't candy)

Orion hacker sends stowaway into SPAAAAACE

ukgnome
FAIL

Re: Boys and their toys -- in spaaaace

Oh Dear h4rm0ny - looks like a HTML fail.

I'm sad for you.

Furious GTA V gamers seek similar ban on violent, misogynistic title: the Holy Bible

ukgnome

Re:

I going to guess at three

How HAPPY am I on a scale of 1 to 10? Where do I click PISSED OFF?

ukgnome

That's why

i wear pajamas on international flights. Everything of value is checked in. The security bod at heathrow was a bit bemused that he didn't get a beep.

BOFH: Santa, bloody Santa

ukgnome

I think that....

I am beginning to warm to Gina

Nothing illegal to see here: Tribunal says TEMPORA spying is OK

ukgnome
Joke

Re: no suspicion that the user has committed any offence?

2. Not on the right-hand side of the pond

Is that looking up or looking down?

It was space vs boat at Orion launch. The boat won

ukgnome

Re: Mission to Mars

ah yes, the galaxy.

When it happens i hear that nasa has employed some minstrels to play.

What smarties, lets hope they get some sort of bounty.

Universal Credit CRISIS: Up to £200m in IT spend WASTED – NAO

ukgnome
Facepalm

surely not?

I wonder who's money it is that's been chucked away?

Hey, it's ... Gecko man, Gecko man, does almost whatever a GECKO can

ukgnome

Re: Glass, hmm..

Don't be silly K

they only do that experiment with solvite wallpaper paste.

Assange™ slumps back on Ecuador's sofa after detention appeal binned

ukgnome
Trollface

I wonder what....

UKIP think about him using a foreign embassy like that? Obviously trolling.

What i meant to put is perhaps he like taking a leak in the waste paper bin.

Britain's HUMAN DNA-strewing Moon mission rakes in £200k

ukgnome
Coat

I haven't read the articles and am assuming that Prof Cox wants me to wank over a rocket, and give him cash for the privilege.

Well if that's so then he has another thing coming

All ABOARD! Furious Facebook bus drivers join Teamsters union

ukgnome
IT Angle

So the story isn't anything to actually do with Facebook. Its a dispute about some bus drivers that get mistreated by their company and not by their companies client.

Move along, nothing to see here.

Our system handles £130bn and it's BUST. Want the job of fixing it? Apply to UK.gov

ukgnome

Sounds Awesome

Just one problem.....well maybe a few problems.

I am not qualified, I lack experience, also I am lacking drive, ambition, and I have low self esteem.

Although when you read it out aloud I seem to be a perfect candidate.