* Posts by Neil Porter

43 publicly visible posts • joined 14 Jun 2007

Only a merciful BULLET can really save a RHINO, say Texas hunters

Neil Porter

Pic

Can I be the first pedant to point out that the picture you have is of a white rhino. Too rare I guess for you to find a decent library picture? I demand you send one of your Reg photographers out to get a proper picture and I volunteer to go along.

White rhinos graze and black rhinos eat from bushes and trees so have a more head up posture. They have a pointier mouth too but it's in profile...

Chaos Computer Club: iPhone 5S finger-sniffer COMPROMISED

Neil Porter

Pinky?

Isn't the workaround for the 5s owner to unlock with their pinky or other alternative finger that they're not prodding their phone with? That removes this hack from the hands of your average thief.

One of last few iPhone 5Ss STOLEN from within MASSIVE POLICE CORDON at Apple Store

Neil Porter

5S is still available in Carphone Warehouse

and no doubt other phone retailers

iPhone 5S: Fanbois, your prints are safe from the NSA, claim infosec bods

Neil Porter

Re: Boring

It depends on what queue you go in at passport control. Not everyone has the new fangled biometric passports.

Ministry of Sound sues Spotify over user playlists

Neil Porter

Re: Do they mix?

I have their 80s Electronic Anthems and they're not mixed. So technically, they could claim that they've put the effort into researching which songs to pull together to create the compilation but that's as far as their effort has gone.

I wish I'd copyrighted some of my old mix tapes from the good old days. Oh hang on...

It's official: Apple sends out invitations for September 10 event

Neil Porter

iLava

Surely it's Apple's re-design of the humble Lava Lamp?

Microsoft Office 365 on iPhone NOW: No, we're not making this up

Neil Porter

The more platforms their customers can access their docs from the better surely.

I don't see Google being humiliated by allowing Google Maps and searches to be done from an Apple phone...

Review: HTC One

Neil Porter
FAIL

Lots of rave reviews but in reality it's disappointing

Had mine a week now and I'm waiting on Vodafone to send me the return bag.

The build quality, screen and camera are all awesome, yes, but the power and volume buttons are rubbish, I have to look to find them and it's too easy to adjust the volume by mistake during a call.

The HTC Sync Manager is buggy and crashes or just doesn't work. The bits that do work are poorly documented and only work patchily, such as only transferring half my music files over.

Lastly, though Android has some cool features, it also has some annoying issues in the email client and the browsers (and I tried Android, Chrome, Opera and Firefox).

Very disappointed, it's much cheaper than an iPhone with an awesome spec but in terms of everyday usability it's a fail from me. Maybe if Android improves and can provide some kind of quality PC syncing experience that is beyond HTC's developers abilities, maybe I'll try again with whatever is the big thing next year. The HTC Two?

Forget about fondling that slab... within 2 years, it'll fondle YOU

Neil Porter
Childcatcher

Re: Oh boy....

It's not difficult, babies only say 3 things: hungry, tired, nappy change please.

Neil Porter
Go

Re: Excuse me.

Wowfood could be just quoting General Disarray of South Park.

I do wonder though if the Simpsons writers had patented all their ideas whether they'd now be winning the Apple vs Samsung patent wars...

Neil Porter
Meh

Context please

It'd be useful if you could provide links back to previous years predictions from IBM. Will we be laughing about predictions of flying cars? Perhaps some of their old predictions actually came true?

Personally I always feel conned by this nonsense. I've been tranished forever by the PR bullsh** from Segway before it was revealed, I thought we were talking jet packs or something exciting...

Far Cry 3 game review

Neil Porter
Happy

Re: I liked Farcry 2

+1

I'm still busy in Skyrim and there's a queue of games on my Amazon wishlist, cheapest gets bought first.

NY Museum of Modern Art embraces 14 video games

Neil Porter
Happy

Parappa The Rapper?

Flow and Katamari Damacy definitely deserve it, but where is Parappa The Rapper?

Spy Hunter

Neil Porter
Facepalm

Re: Excellent bit of music

How can you be useless at Spy Hunter? It was easy. Playing on the Speccy version my mate and I could do the whole thing on 1 life.

Oh, those happy summers days. It beat going out in the fresh air and talking to people...

Screen idols: higher resolution means better laptops

Neil Porter
Happy

It's not difficult people

Some of the comments here make out it's difficult to get a high res screen. It's not, use the filter on your shopping website of choice and there is a lot of choice, mostly for reasonable money. I'm on my third full-hd screened laptop and my monitors are all 1920x1200 and have been for years.

I don't know how others cope with using Visual Studio on a low res screen.

If there is to be an advancement to higher res screens, bring it on!

Philips intros dual-view telly tech

Neil Porter
Meh

Sound?

Do the glasses have headphones built in or do you have to hear both programmes at the same time?

Work from home, find a new hobby, buy a fountain - UK.gov

Neil Porter
Coat

List of hobbies?

Why are they linking to Wikipedia for a list of hobbies when we have the UK's own King Of Hobbies, Simon Quinlank.

For this hobby you will need a flask of weak lemon drink...

Bethesda promises fix for Skyrim Xbox graphics glitch

Neil Porter
Childcatcher

Couldn't agree more

Will 28 has it spot on.

I'm baffled why the Scrolls and Fallout games get released with so many bugs. I could understand if it was something bizarre like when you go to x location and talk to y person in z order then your pet dog floats about but they are releasing with such obvious and basic bugs.

Spend some money on testing guys. It's a win-win investment.

HP downgrades Slate Windows tab

Neil Porter
WTF?

TouchPad?!?!

Why are HP doing another tablet after the TouchPad? Was it just WebOS that killed it?

I just don't get HP's strategy.

Anonymous shuts down hidden child abuse hub

Neil Porter
Thumb Up

Are the peadophiles the criminals here...

...or is it the business man in his suit and tie?

Yeah, it's the paedophiles.

Well done anonymous.

Survey: '4 million' Brits stung by ID theft

Neil Porter

Does this include the Playstation hack?

4 million sounds a bit high, does this include all the bank details stolen by the Playstation hackers?

In which case it's not all down to the consumers being complacent!

BOFH: Where's my free fondleslab?

Neil Porter
Unhappy

Tried it, doesn't work (or hasn't, yet)

I tried it on my blog with a faux award to Cadburys for the Double Decker and yet I've still not been contacted to send me any free chocolate.

World Chocolate Bar of The Year my arse...

I had thought about going for Porsche next.

Star Wars: The Complete Saga Blu-ray disc set

Neil Porter
Joke

These aren't the blu-rays you're looking for...

Am I the first to comment that? I suspect not.

Of course, they *are* the blu-rays I'm looking for, yay!

The IBM PC is 30

Neil Porter
Thumb Up

Classic

Got one in my loft, the keyboard is better than anything you can get today...

OCZ shares trashed by short seller's research note

Neil Porter
Pirate

Buy, buy, buy

So if the stock is still down after the note has been proven to be untrue, surely the stock is currently a bargain?

After a 25% drop, even a small portion of that value being returned equals a tidy profit. It wouldn't surprise me if the fraudster who shorted is now going long...

Somerset council looks for cuts in Southwest One

Neil Porter
Flame

Chief Exec wants another payrise

Somerset needs to save money considering what they're already paying their chief exec and what they paid to get rid of the last one.

CoD: Black Ops 'not fit for purpose', fans claim

Neil Porter
Go

Fallout New Vegas next?

Black Ops may be buggy but it's nothing compared with the many, many bugs in the latest Fallout. It's a great game but it crashes way too often, characters in walls, flying dogs, etc.

For £40 I expect a bit of testing...

Seat in sexy e-sportster shock

Neil Porter
Thumb Down

Whoop de doo

So it's a Seat re-branding of the Scirocco with some hybrid tech. Yawn.

Spandau Ballet get the Tourette's karaoke treatment

Neil Porter
Go

Well done chap

Does he do bookings? My birthday is coming up....

Hybrid CD vinyl unites warring tribes

Neil Porter
WTF?

Gimmick

But the hole in the middle will either be too big for my record player or too small for my CD player...

A woman spends 287 days choosing what to wear

Neil Porter
FAIL

Wrong - their claims were way to quick

So they polled women? That was their first mistake, if they'd polled their partners they would've got a more accurate figure. In reality it takes much longer...

Google caches payment card details for 19,000 Brits

Neil Porter
Joke

Don't worry

The way to check if your credit card details are affected is to type your credit card number into Google and do a search. To be extra thorough, also do this search on Yahoo, MSN, etc.

That'll do it.

Anyone without the time or skills to do this, please post your credit card numbers here and I will search for you.

Royal Mail disses runaway post van man

Neil Porter
IT Angle

Oliver Mayes - shame on you!

This guy prevented 1 or more people getting run over or an accident with other vehicles without regard for his own safety. In my book that makes him a "hero".

Misery guts Oliver Mayes would rather not get involved and let these kids, old people and other motorists be subjected to fate and the incompetence of a royal mail employee.

Booooooo!!1!!one

Sub-prang panic: Calm down, it happens all the time

Neil Porter
Pirate

So,

have the french surrendered yet?

HP prepping 2133 Mini-Note rival

Neil Porter
Coat

Packaging?

But how big is the box? ;O)

HP packaging madness continues apace

Neil Porter
Heart

Matt Bryant loves HP

Wooooooohh!!!! I'm gonna tell everyone.

Matt wants to kiss HP and everything. I saw them holding hands last week!

Now back to the crazy packaging stories....

Telegraph falls to the Tw*t-O-Tron

Neil Porter
Happy

Eva is having good comment for you

My favourite comments on The Telegraph are by Eva who I've spotted several times responding to Jeff Randall pieces. She "is" a young lady from Poland working in London:

"Reason I write you is I have offered job me in Peppermint Hippo café for mens last night I go interview . They tell me much mens with lot money including 'oligarchs' you mention above here. Many mens from 'City'. I have to make coffee and take it to table and that is all he tell me I make £1,000 per day in tip tax-frees! Is this correct? I work in Café now and make £40 per day and tax--what different in Peppermint Hippo ?? He say uniform provided of costume of swimming because hot there. I see some girls so hot they take off costume ! My mother always told me : " Ava , Nie wychodzi jedyny przy wieczór późny nocny albo wilk będzie jeść was!" which means : " Ava , if you wear swimming costume in public , always shave armpits and empty bottom first !" I never forget my mother's advice . "

'Great tits cope well with warming'

Neil Porter
Coat

Yay

All this TMWRNJ talk has got me in a flap. Flap like a birds wing.

Mines the one with a Corrs shrine in the inside pocket

Neil Porter
Happy

Eggsellent

I said Egg! Bring back TMWRNJ!

In South Africa they have a bird called the Secretary Bird which has long legs and eats snakes. I've seen one, and they swallow!

Nintendo sounds Wii-free Xmas warning

Neil Porter
Thumb Down

Cynical Marketing Ploy

Go to Barcelona. Not 1 shop I went in last week were sold out and they all had plenty. This is either bad planning by Nintendo or deliberate.

Won't somebody think about the children?

Record industry pushes ISPs to cut off file sharers

Neil Porter
Black Helicopters

Bovvered?

Who cares? People will always find a way to get music for free. Record it from the radio, TV or off your mates.

James Bond ditches the Aston Martin

Neil Porter

Going back to his roots!?!

Of course this decision is entirely motivated by going back to Bond's roots in the books and nothing to do with Bentley offering them more money to feature one of their cars.

US prof plans to send message back in time

Neil Porter

Maybe

Maybe for this thing/method to work you need a machine to receive the message. So no time travel emails can be recieved until it gets built.

BTW I am submitting this comment FROM THE FUTURE!!